There’s one thing I know for certain.
There is nothing that defines Americanessness more in the following order than Stephen Colbert, apple pie, cheese burgers, bacon, ice cream, hot dogs, pickles, and pepto bismol.
So to honor Americanessness, and the upcoming Election Day free sex, beer bong party, legalized marijuana, love-fest that is our country’s political process, I, at this blog, proudly present a soon to be an american classic.
The Stephen Colbertwich
It is an all American apple pie bacon cheese burger topped with a hot dog, a dill pickle, a cherry, and served with a side of ice cream, whip cream, mayo, mustard, ketchup, and a shot of pepto bismol
Recipe: serves 1 Real American
1 slice of apple pie
1 fried apple pie
1/3 pound All American Grade A ground beef patty, grilled
1 slice of American Cheese
2-3 pieces of bacon
1 pigs in a blanket hot dog, baked
1 gherkin pickle
1 maraschino cherry
1 scoop vanilla ice cream
Decorations: A bust of one Stephen Colbert, and an American Flag tooth pick
Place a piece of apple pie on a plate. Top is it with the cheeseburger, bacon and condiments. Then top the cheese burger patty with the fried apple pie. Place a skewer threw the apple pie cheese burger, and place the pickle through it followed by the hot dog, followed by the bust of Stephen Colbert, and finally top with a cherry with an American Flag Tooth Pick.
Say the Pledge of Allegiance then eat immediately.
USA, USA, USA